Falling in Love, again.

This may sound weird to some, but mentally I did not allow myself to bond with the unborn child. I knew he was in there. After heartache of the past, I kind of ignored below my chest as much as that is possible to do.
When I had my first baby 8 years ago, I instantly bonded. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on (except my husband, of course. he he) The thought of ever paying a babysitter to watch him was absurd to me. They should pay me to hold him!
But through different birth and newborn experiences, and heart break, that changed. I was unsure how this postpartum would unfold. I knew a newborn would be a lot of work. I knew my other children would go through their jealous phase. I knew I would miss sleep. I knew my body would have to heal. I knew we would have to figure out nursing together. But all those concerns have dissolved. I am truly loving this newborn! I can't stop kissing and snuggling him. He is so sweet! I love his squeaks and grunts. I love his smell. I love his softness. I love his little diapers. I love him needing my milk. I love his little features. I love his newborn cry. I love the white fuzz on his head. I love his sleepy eyes. I love it! I had forgotten that part.